Failing at Love

Scripture: (1 Corinthians 13:4-8) Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy. It does not boast. It is not proud. It does not dishonor others; it is not self-seeking. It is not easily angered; it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love is an essential part of life; it is a basic human need. Without love we die; maybe not a physical death but definitely an emotional and/or mental death. There are many studies that show how important physical love is to babies and how children in orphanages in Romania and China declined physically because they were not held; not loved.  In 1943, Maslow wrote a paper that touched on the need to be loved. Love was a part of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. Nevertheless, not even this psychologist could explain love or show its importance the way that God does.

There are four different types of love: eros (passionate love), agape (Godly love), storge (familiar love), and phila (brotherly love). The Bible speaks about love often. First Corinthians 13:13 says; That out of faith, hope, and love; the greatest is love. Wow, consider for a moment, that love is greater than faith: the complete trust or confidence in God and it is greater than hope: the confident expectation of what God has promised. As Believers, we should indeed do as we are instructed and that is to first, love the Lord completely with our mind and soul and secondly to love our neighbor as ourself (Matthew 22). Husbands are directed to love their wives like Christ loves the church (Ephesians 5). Truthfully, I don’t think that is possible but if a man sets out to actually do this he can’t go wrong with his wife or God. Why? because this type of love purifies, protects, and presents in a way that is acceptable to the Lord. Love is an action word and it is throughout the Bible: For God so loved the world He gave (John 3:16); greater love no man has than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends (John 15:13); hatred stirs up conflict, but love covers all wrongs (Proverbs 10:12); Above all, love each other deeply because love covers a multitude of sins (1Peter 4:8). The word love is mentioned over 500 times in the Bible…500 times. Within those 500 times, the Lord gives us a description of what love looks like. The Lord said that LOVE IS
•Patient
•Kind
•Generous (doesn’t envy)
•Humble (not proud)
•Modest (doesn’t boast)
•Self-sacrificing (is not self-seeking)
•Imperturbable/composed (not easily angered)
•Respectful (doesn’t dishonor others)
•Keeps no record of wrongs
•Virtuous (does not delight in evil)
•Rejoices in truth
•Protects
•Trust (always)
•Hopes (always)
•Perseveres (doesn’t give up)

As I read this description, I realize that I have failed at love. I’ve expected others to love me, but I have failed at loving back. Even the unconditional love our parents have for us fails to meet this description fully. Whew! The Lord expects us to love like He does, and He’s the greatest example of what Love looks like. The Bible tells us that God is love (John 4:15), that God so loved that He gave (John 3:16), and that God demonstrated His love toward us that when we were still sinners, Christ died for us (Romans 5:8). Now, that’s love.

Prayer: Dear Heavenly Father, thank You for showing me what love truly looks like. Thank You for Your example of love. Forgive us Father for failing to love the way You taught us to love; the way You showed us to love. So many times, our love is conditional when Your love is unconditional. Continue Lord, to grow us, to prune us, and nurture us so we can love others like You love us. Thank You, Lord for Your Son, Jesus the Christ, who died and rose for my sins. In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.

(by Pat Towns)